oh the humanity

The entry below is copied and pasted from an email exchange Brian and I had earlier today. I need to preface the story by telling you that our youth group is coming to our house tonight. I decided I needed to finish editing the video of our summer trip to Denver so that we could view it tonight...but our video editing software makes me want to stab my leg with a blunt object. (Some of you already know that.) So it's a long a laborious process. I also decided that I should make 50 different options of snacks - which the kids probably won't even like because they only seem to fancy pizza rolls and plain cheese pizza. So that put me way behind schedule-wise.

Also, the story below clearly shows that I am in danger of my life everytime I sit down to blog. Be aware that this is a high risk behavior.




From: Lisa Showalter
Sent: Wednesday, September 17, 2008 1:16
To: Brian Showalter
Subject: Oh the humanity
Did you happen to see the computer room this morning?



From: Brian Showalter
Sent: Wednesday, September 17, 2008 1:18
To: Lisa Showalter
Subject: Re: Oh the humanity

What happened?! Cat/Dog poo... vomit...

From: Lisa Showalter
Sent: Wednesday, September 17, 2008 1:35
To: Brian Showalter
Subject: Re: Oh the humanity


(i'm going to see if i can write this email without using any caps.)

you didn't see it?!?!?!?!

you may have noticed how there were flip flops sitting at the entrance to the office. or you may not have because you're not always really observant. the flip flops are there in case entry to the room is desired, entry to the room without getting involved in a bloody mess that is.

this morning, somewhere between the hours of 12:00 a.m. and 3:15 a.m., i was sitting there minding my own business, reading whole chapters of my book in the time it took for a new window to open up on the computer, when suddenly there was a loud popping noise, and then a crazy crack/shatter sound. basically, the light fixture exploded. all over the flippin' place. i put a flourescent bulb in this weekend. evidently it gets too hot in the enclosed light sconce. hmm. explosion. it's nothing short of a miracle that it didn't happen while a student was sitting at my piano, or that bunzy or the cats weren't laying there, or that nothing in the room was hurt (i don't even think it scratched the piano or the bench), or that i didn't end up with a glass shard the size of a manatee in my eyeball. i continued working. that's how i roll.

the video finished moments before i left the house this morning at 9:20. (I started the recording at 3:20ish) i didn't have time to test it. it better stinking work.

i hope you come home with lots of energy to get stuff done because i didn't get to sleep until 4 a.m. and i'm running a little low on energy (thus the "no caps" - too much effort).

now tell me a story.


So, far no response has been forthcoming from the sleeping beauty who missed my brush with the grim reaper. Also, I'm hoping he'll clean up the glass when he gets home.

Four Womyn in New Mexico

Ahhhhh, a great vacation had by all. I'll try to sum it up in a relatively short manner. (Alright, I'm part way through writing this entry and it's not going to be short. Sorry.)

The Characters:

Heather Birky (A great traveler, but not the one I'd put in charge during a crisis)

Janice Eigsti Miller (A calm companion who is pregnant but, mysteriously, still eats less than me.)

Lisa Showalter (The one who panics)

Andrea Yoder (A seasoned traveler who has been known to turn into a doctor, or any profession that is called upon during any given crisis.)

Day 1: Flight into Albuquerque. No sleep the night before. We accidentally attend the Republican National Convention in Minneapolis during a layover. We arrive at our adobe casa where Sir Russell Betts graciously greets us. Heather eats an Indian taco and also immediately declares her love for Santa Fe - like any common hussy might. We are so tired. So tired. MUST GET ANDREA! She waits at a bus stop in Santa Fe. Heather's too tired to drive our luxury car (two free upgrades) and I'm too tired to walk. Confusion and crazy behavior ensues. Andrea is collected.

Day 2: White water rafting. Not only do I not cry the entire day, but turns out I pretty much kick booty at rowing. Andrea, Heather, and I (Prego stayed at the Casa for this adventure) share a boat with our guide Joel wherein Joel receives the complement from other guides that he has a "fast boat." Evidently quite a complement. He may have been worried when he saw three womyn head toward his boat but it turns out he had nothing to fear. He had three super-powerful, mid-west bred, white water rafting heroines.

Day 3: Tooling around Santa Fe, discovering it's mysteries, including the Georgia O'Keefe Museum and one set of mystery stairs in the Loretto Chapel. Heather has Indian Taco number two and counts it a miracle because she simply did not think she would ever eat another one in her life. I buy my first piece of turquoise and am informed that turquoise "goes with everything."

Day 4: This is the day I nearly convert to Catholicism. We visit the Santuario at Chimayo which has healing dirt inside. We all rub the blessed dirt about our bodies. (I also brought some home - let me know if you are in need.) This is actually a very moving place where people leave baby shoes, pictures of loved ones, crutches, etc... We eat at a KFC, unaware that Indian Tacos are available at the Pueblo we visit later. The Pueblo is incredibly interesting.

Day 5: Ojo Caliente (mineral springs and day spa): My first massage, by a man named Richard, who unlocked my secrets. (He wondered why my forearms and hands were so strong - I told him it's because I am a pianist - but I think we all know it was probably from the mighty rowing I had done a few days previous.) Dipping in the various springs followed: iron, arsenic!, and soda. A drink of lithium water was sipped, and mud baths were had by everyone. Several hippies spotted here.

Day 6: Oooh, this was a full day. I'll divide it into two parts.

Part 1: Bandelier Monument: Here we hiked, saw and crawled in cliff dwellings, and one of us was stung by a nuclear bee. (Alright, it was me.) Heather remained very calm (until later when she had to climb a few ladders) and removed the stinger from my wounded hand. I still think it may have been a one-toothed rattlesnake bite. Heather swears it didn't look like a snake tooth that she pulled out. The park ranger was not amused by my asking if the bees are particularly vicious or powerful there. ("Our bees are JUST FINE! It's the humans who react to them differently.") This is also where Heather panics when she is the last to fill her water bottle and cannot get the water pump on the trail to work and accuses us of "taking all the water." We then head to Los Alamos which was only a half hour away (thus the nuclear bee). We see many secret agents and undercover scientists around town. I'm sure of it.

Part 2: Zozobra: We heard about this on the news the night before (after watching the Sarah Palin speech together which I will withhold all comments about). Turns out this crazy event happens every year after labor day to kick off Fiestas de Santa Fe. A 50 foot marionette of "Old Man Gloom" is burned to dispel the hardships and travails of the last year. You can write your gloom down and put it in a box to be burned with Zozobra (and then you receive a sticker and glow-stick which pleased the child in me). We watch the three snipers on two of the nearby rooftops and hear about how the plaza is completely shut down by the police after the burning. We wonder what in the world we have gotten ourselves into. When it's been dark for an hour (not at dusk like the event info would have you believe), and the crowd is getting restless, they begin the ceremonial burning. It is very exciting and not a little creepy. The crowd is screaming "BURN HIM!!" (Heck yeah, I joined in.) And then amid fireworks and dancers, he goes up in flames. Afterwards there are shouts all through the streets of "VIVA LA FIESTA" and everyone nearby answers, "VIVA!!" We were so glad we decided to go to this very local and unique event, and it was only a few blocks from our casa. Way cool. We have a run in with the local security when we decide we'll walk through the closed plaza. Heather gets lippy and is ready to "stick it to the man." Cooler heads prevail.

Day 7: I wake up to one normal-sized hand and one that resembles an animal paw because it so swollen from the nuclear bee sting. We head to Ghost Ranch, which is the area where Georgia O'Keefe owned a home and it is the landscape that inspired much of her art. The landscape is beautiful red rocks. We take an epic hike with an awe inspiring view that rewarded our journey. It was a magnificent thing to do on our last day. We head back to Santa Fe where Heather has Indian taco number three. We then walk up to Old Fort Marcy Park to watch our last sunset together in New Mexico. I have no words...

Day 8: MUST GET ANDREA TO THE BUS STOP! I overhear someone on the street saying there would be a parade and I advise Heather and Andrea to leave a little early. Janice is taken just in case roads are blocked off and map reading is needed. Left alone to pack I enjoy a moment outside before I need to get in the shower...when peeling into the drive comes our luxury sedan, kicking up dust and screeching to a halt. Two wild-eyed women who resemble Heather and Janice tear out of the car and tell me to PACK NOW! WE HAVE TO GET OUT OF SANTA FE! THE PARADE HAS ALL ROADS SHUT DOWN! (We find out later it is a dog parade.) I get ready as quickly as I can but I'm not really feeling the panic. We leave town and our adorable casa. We leave too quickly. We don't have any problems leaving town so we decide to take the scenic route to the airport, stopping in Madrid for last minute shopping. We lose track of the time and it ends with Heather chasing Janice and I down, partly on foot, partly in the luxury sedan - complete with horn honking. There is slight panic getting to the airport but we make it. Heather has Indian taco number four. We find Andrea waiting to board our airplane (her earlier flight had been canceled). We all arrive home safe and sound, with wonderful memories created, and something like 1,000 pictures to sort through.

Until next year...VIVA LA FIESTA!!