Celebrating Love

This post is a bit late considering that it began on February 14 and the subject matter is the oh-so-controversial topic of Valentine's Day. 

You see, I began this post while Brian was at work on the great day of love, but the day took a bit of an unexpected turn.  Here's the story.

Every year as Valentine's Day approaches, Brian and our friend Dan begin ranting and raving about how it's a made-up holiday created by the card companies to make men spend money.  While it has been exploited by the card companies, it certainly wasn't created by them.  And if it was - so what?  Is there anything wrong with having one day a year that we recognize love and the great gift it is to us human beings - and not just romantic love, but love in general?  What would life be without relationships that lend meaning to our existence and provide us with joy and nurturing?  I think that holidays in general break the tedium of everyday life.  Which is why I look forward to St. Patrick's Day with zeal and hit haunted houses every Halloween!  We need these little spots of levity to keep our lives from growing dreary.  So a day honoring love isn't such a bad thing in my opinion.

But whenever the topic is brought up Brian has this go-to phrase he likes to say.  It goes something like this: "Why should I have to do something special for Lisa on Valentine's Day?  I celebrate our love every day." 

And every time he says it I think: Oh really?  Pray tell, what is this daily celebration you speak of?  What are these ceremonies and festivities that are taking place commemorating our great love each day?  Because if you're partying it up over our love each day, I don't think you've invited me to the celebration. 

Now, I know, I know, celebrating can be in the small things, blah, blah, blah.  However, it might be more appropriate to say that he lives in a state of gratitude for our love each day.  Expressing that love and gratitude in small ways.  (Perhaps in the way he leaves his slippers on the dresser every night, or eats all the yummy food in the house?  Just kidding!  No, he really does those things but I know it's not out of love.)  He's very good at expressing love and acting out in love in so many ways each day.  It just sort of hurts my feelings when he acts like it's the hugest burden in the world to spend a day really celebrating it, like it's not worth whooping it up over our relationship for a day.

But I'm used to the attitude, I kind of get it, and I'm not sore about it and I don't harbor secret expectations.  So this Valentine's Day I set about making a dinner of spaghetti and meatballs for our romantic supper.  (Because I take all my romantic cues from "Lady and the Tramp.")  And Brian was happy.  (He loves spaghetti!)  And we had a lovely dinner and I was feeling quite satisfied.

Then he goes and brings this out of the kitchen:

The prettiest, sweetest little Valentine's Day ring ever!  (He knows I have a thing for rings - as in I crazy love them.)  Maybe because it hasn't been automatic all of these years to receive a gift, this one felt really special.  It was so out of the blue, such a pure surprise, that it brought so much more joy than if I had been expecting a Valentine's Day token or gift.

No, next year I won't be expecting that he has to get me a gift.  If he does I'll be happy but if not, I'll still know that I'm loved.  Maybe by our 25th Valentine's Day together we'll finally have this figured out...but if not, I'll always have 2011.